“That was the best day of my life.”
Accessing everyday advantaged social life through experiences.
For some parents in this project, simply having the chance to come together as a family and share an outing, something that so many experience regularly as a norm of family life, was something entirely new and incredibly important.
“The implications for bringing a family together, the cost implications are a lot. And if I can just take that away from you to provide you with that quality time together as your family, then that's what I'd like to do. And they were really blown away because actually, they haven't been in our school for that long. And the Dad just said, “I can't put into words how kind this is”. And then he came back in a couple, you know, a couple of days after they'd seen it. And he said, “you know, we had the best time ever. We've never got together as a family like that.”
Laura, Worthing teacher.
Many advantaged children experience liminal transitional spaces that provide everyday opportunities to build recognition, experience connection and are able to take advantage of opportunities. These experiences allow them to build recognition in the moments where they experience something different, new or enriching. They have the opportunity to strengthen relationships and build confidence by talking about them. This can be conspicuously absent from those experiencing disadvantage, who can experience the everyday trauma of having nothing to say about themselves.
These experiences allow them to build recognition in the moments where they experience something different, new or enriching.
“I always find this, you come back after summer holiday and in a class you may well have children talking about what they've done in the holidays. And you've got these children that have been here, there and everywhere. It's almost traumatic for a kid to sit there and have nothing to say and think ‘I haven't done anything’. And that just compounds that feeling that they don't get access to things that other children do.”
Helen, local deputy head teacher.
Social ties and peer acceptance are crucial in children’s social, economic and cultural life. However, those living with disadvantage can find it harder to relate to advantaged peers who are able to form ties through the shared experiences that those in disadvantaged can neither experience, or as important, talk about to peers.
In determining both young people’s social relations, identities and opportunities, the importance of belonging has particular importance for young people’s lives, not least those who are disadvantaged and whose capacity to belong is limited by their capacity to talk about shared experiences. Personal relationships with peers help to engender a sense of belonging and can influence the decisions and actions they take going forward but having the means to connect through experiences is a vital part of this.
Personal relationships with peers help to engender a sense of belonging.